OMGWTFBIBLE

Leviticus is a very shocking book, full of all sorts of terrifying rules that we don't care about anymore. Even more shocking is how pretty much the first third of it is basically a cook book. So who better to read David Tuchman's new translation from Hebrew than culinary historian Michael Twitty? NOBODY, that's who. Listen now to the Season 3 premiere of OMGWTFBIBLE!

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Direct download: 34.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Finish out Exodus with this massive very big episode! Listen to Catie Lazarus, Shulem Deen, Luzer Twersky, and Wendy Chin read chapters 76 through 115 of David Tuchman's brand-new, not-boring translation of the Hebrew Bible!

Direct download: JTBB_Exodus_3.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 9:49am EDT

Get your Exodus fix right here! David Tuchman blows through chapters 32 to 75 of his translation of the Hebrew Bible, joined by guests Michael Schreiber, Kevin Sefton, Rabbi Leah Jordan, Rachel Rose Reid, Sha James, and Mark Leuchter.

Direct download: JTBB_Exodus_2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 1:26pm EDT

Are you overwhelmed by how many Exodus episodes there are? Well, this is the episode for you! It's just about 2 hours, and jam-packed with the first three parts of Exodus, with readings by guests Mordechai Levovitz, Y-Love, and Rishe Groner from David Tuchman's new translation of the Hebrew Bible. Listen now and get caught up fast!

Direct download: JTBB_Exodus_1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 9:17am EDT

Here it is! The end of Exodus! And it sure is full of linen, just like you expected! Other things it's full of: fashion thoughts, Wendy Chin, David Tuchman, funny Bible translations, Jewish thinking, UGLY UGLY CLOTHING, and DECORATING! Please enjoy! And get ready to wait MONTHS before the next one because we're done until it's time for Leviticus!

Direct download: 33.2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This is it, folks. The beginning of the end. The first last episode of Exodus. And let me tell you, I think God's trolling us. Becuase this is literally the same stuff that happened before. But this time, the JOKES are new! Thank God for David Tuchman! And also for Wendy Chin, his intrepid reader in the very fashion-backwards episode 33.1!

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Direct download: 33.1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Not gonna lie: not much happens in this episode's reading. However, Luzer Twersky and David Tuchman have a bit of a breakdown trying to get through it. And you've probably never had as many disgusting thoughts about candelabras as these two do. Listen to episode 32.2 now, because it is a wonderful, wonderful mess!

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Direct download: 32.2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

We hit chapter 100 in Book 2 and things start to fall apart. As the narrative drags, David Tuchman and guest Luzer Twersky (star of the new film "Felix and Meira"! Check it out!) start to lose their grips on reality. Do you want to see how crazy the Bible can drive two men? Want to know how ex-Hasid Luzer Twersky ended up playing a Hasidic man in an independent movie garnering loads of critical attention? Listen now!

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Direct download: 32.1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

We've finally reached one of the most important parts of the Bible: the part where God shows Moses his butt and God's butt breaks Moses's face. For real. Sure, sure, there's other stuff about forgiveness and laws and two possible versions of the Ten Commandments, but who cares about that when Shulem Deen, author of "All Who God Not Return," is reading about the glory of God's butt?

That's right, no one.

Listen now. There's no other reasonable thing to do.

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Direct download: 31_2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Have you ever read the Bible? OK, but have you ever read the Bible on weed? In episode 31.1, Shulem Deen stops by OMGWTFBIBLE to talk about All Who Go Do Not Return, his new memoir, and also to talk about a controversial translation of the Bible that seems to include cannabis as part of the priestly anointing oil. Who knew?

Also in this episode: the whole Golden Calf thing happens and theres very probably an orgy. Join the fun and listen now!

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Direct download: 31_1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Are you ready to be grossed out? At this point, Episode 30.2 of OMGWTFBIBLE, the narrative of the Bible completely breaks down and it just turns into graphic depictions of bloody, bloody sacrifices. Why is this holy or important? I dont know, but it sure is fun to listen to. 

Check out Catie Lazarus, host of Employee of the Month, as she reads David Tuchmans bible translation now! You might learn something about animal sacrifices or at least about Alan Dershowitz.

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Direct download: Episode_30-2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Sure God created the world, drowned almost everyone in a massive flood, killed a bunch of Egyptians, and has sorts of laws he wants people to care about, but did you know he also designs clothing? Its true! And thats what guest Catie Lazarus spends the majority of Episode 30.1 of OMGWTFBIBLE reading!

The hilarious host of Employee of the Month, Catie joins OMGWTFBIBLE host David Tuchman to read about some divine fashion choices that have been out of style for a little while. What does she think of holy vests? Can she pull off a Godly breastplate? Find out now!

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Direct download: Episode_30-1_final.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

When we last left our heroes, David Tuchman and Mark Leuchter were in Raven Lounge in Philadelphia, reading about all the stuff God wanted in his desert tent. Thats right, they were halfway through Terumah, the seventh portion of Exodus, and growing weary of all of Gods very specific and confusing instructions.

Can they make it through? Can they finish episode 29.2, complete Gods directions, and find something remotely meaningful to talk about in all this? Find out on the next episode of OMGWTFBIBLE, available right here, right now!

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Direct download: Episode_29_2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

OMGWTFBIBLE with David Tuchman has hit Philadelphia! On February 25th, David was joined by Temple professor Mark Leuchter at Raven Lounge in Philly to read Terumah, the seventh portion in Exodus next to a stripper pole. Among other things, they discussed Professor Leuchters love of guitars, his approach to the Bible, and why in the world God spent so much time on building directions.

Thats right, building directions. In episode 29.1, with all those pesky laws out of the way, God spends a great deal of time describing some stuff he wants made. Is it interesting? Are there any questions that can be asked about this? Why is it in the Bible in the first place? Listen and find out. Maybe.

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Direct download: Episode_29_1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Have you ever wondered about the appropriate liquids in which to boil kid goats? Thirsty to know when the best time to go to the bathroom is? Do not fear! The Bible, as rewritten by David Tuchman in OMGWTFBIBLE, is here!

In episode 28.2, David is joined by Sha James to read the second half of Mishpatim, the sixth portion in Exodus. And, oh my is it a doozy. Episode 28.2 is pretty hard to put into words, especially because its really all over the place, so you may as well just start listening right now.

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Direct download: Episode_28.2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Rules, rules, rules! Everyones always saying that the Bible is full of rules we have to follow because God said so or something. If youve been listening to OMGWTFBIBLE, David Tuchmans brand-new translation of the Hebrew Bible, you might be wondering where those rules are hidden with all the explosions and wacky sex stuff going on. 

Well, its time for rules, starting with part six of Exodus, Mishpatim, in episode 28.1 Sha James is the guest, and the two discuss just how much these rules can be applied to life. Does the Bible have anything to say about vaccines? Maybe! Listen and find out.

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Direct download: 28_1_20150225.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Where's OMGWTFBIBLE been? Buried under piles of snow, most likely! But we're about to return! Next week, we've got two shows, which means a whole lot of episodes on the way. Listen here and be enlightened.

Direct download: omgwtfbible_announce.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:50pm EDT

Here it is! The big one! In episode 27.3 of OMGWTFBIBLE, David Tuchman and Rachel Rose Reid read what everyone knows as The Ten Commandments. And itsinteresting. Sure, the commandments themselves are pretty impressive, but the laws that follow them—not so much. And are there even really 10 commandments? Listen to the third part of Yitro and find out!

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Direct download: 27_3.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

In episode 27.2, David is joined by Rabbi Leah Jordan to read the second third of Parshat “Yitro.” Sadly, not much happens this week plot-wise. God spends most of it repeating the same directions over and over, preparing the people to receive his all-important law. But that doesn’t mean David and Rabbi Jordan don’t have a lot of fun dissecting all the goofiness—and discussing Judaism, God, the Reform movement in the U.K. and the U.S., growing up in Kansas City, and much more. Listen to it all here! 

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Direct download: 27_2.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

Well, pip-pip cheerio! Back in December, David Tuchman went to the Limmud UK conference at the University of Warwick in England to record OMGWTFBIBLE with a slew of wonderful guests and did his best to avoid doing his terrible British accents on tape.

 This time around, in episode 27.1, David is joined by Kevin Sefton, Limmud chair. Together, they read the first third of Parshat “Yitro,” what in the world Limmud is, why in the world Yitro pops in for this little story and never appears again, and whether his legacy was worth it. Listen to it all here!

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Direct download: 27_1.mp3
Category:comedy -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

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